Before the Sun Sets and the Moment is Gone

muddy shoes

You would have been 69 today!  Happy Birthday dear Sis!

This morning, my buddy and I took a morning walk along the bay front and I mentioned to her that you were on my mind. You would have enjoyed that walk, sis. On the way back, we decided to take a short cut. We had been pondering over this short cut for months. It all depended on whether or not the tide was low, or high. Well today, all the elements were working for us. It was a very low tide; sunny outside, no wind — perfect day to try the short cut and have an adventure. The catch was, and of course, this is where the excitement comes in, we might get 1/2 a mile out and discover that the tide was coming in and we would be caught with no choice but to turn back.

My friend walked ahead of me, as we worked our way through what is normally a marshy area only suitable for water birds and an occasional coyote. The ground was very wet because it’s usually under water, and very muddy. It was also very stinky, which added to the adventure. I took care to step exactly where my friend had stepped moments before me. I figured, she hasn’t slipped and face planted into the mud, so if I just stick to her footprints all will be good. We approached a little river-let of water which required expert balance in order to step on to stones and avoid sinking knee deep into the marsh. My friend made it across in no time. As I took my first step I lost my balance and one foot sunk into the mud. It made a delightful farting sound as I pulled my foot out of the mud — and that’s when I knew that you were right there with me. I laughed out loud and threw you a kiss. My friend missed the whole thing, muttering something about raccoon prints up ahead.

I love you, dear Peg, and miss you so very much.


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History will have to record that the greatest tragedy of this period of social transition was not the strident clamor of the bad people, but the appalling silence of the good people.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Speak Up!


Do you have someone in your life that you care about deeply? Then get up, don’t just sit there! Do something! Say something! Stand up to the leaders of this country and demand gun control legislation now! Say something! Spread the word. Pray for peace.

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Over the Rainbow

Hi Sis, How’s it going in Heaven? Were you one of the greeters? I hope so sweetie! I know that you would know just what to say and do! What’s new, you ask? I don’t even know where to start.

RAINBOW FLAGSI was talking to my buddy about what happened in Orlando. I was saying that this is not the same world that mom and dad, or even you, lived in. We agreed that perhaps the world isn’t that different, but the big difference is technology. Due to technology, we see so much more. We hear about the good, bad and ugly seconds after it happens, or while it’s happening, in brilliant color.

I’ve thought about this, and I have changed my mind. In the short time since you passed, the world as you knew it HAS changed. The bad guys have found us sis. They have crossed an imaginary sea, guns blazing.

Sis, get this. A crazy guy walks into a gun store. Yep, born in the United States, but as early as 3rd grade, this guy has a history of troubles. Santa is definitely not pleased. He actually makes it on an FBI watch list — but regardless, walks into a gun store and buys a….. wait for it…. MACHINE GUN! Not a bow and arrow. Not a BB Gun. Not a hand gun. A flippin’ machine gun – and no one stops him. No red flags. Really? Seriously? Who are these people, sis? Is money their God? I’d say so.

He walks into a gay night club in Orlando and brutally massacres 49 innocent people. I know you know this. I’m guessing that the news reached Heaven long before it reached the rest of us.

So, what I really wanted to share with you is this. My dear friend and I drove through the Castro today. Rainbows lined the street! My heart swelled as I thought of you. How wonderful it would have been if you could have been here to fly your flag too, surrounded by others that refused to be afraid and stood together to slay that dragon we call fear!

Sis, we are trying to figure it out. We haven’t given up.So don’t give up on us! Somewhere, there is love. There must be love. In honor of all those beautiful lives lost – please, just love.

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Pickled Pigs Feet & Artichokes

DAD WITH TOMATOSure, I’ll try it Dad. I know! If you don’t try it, how will you know if you like it?  Pigs’ feet? Are you sure about this? Hey! Not bad! Mayonnaise? Dip the artichoke in mayonnaise? OK, I’ll try it.

Dad, are you watching over me? Can you see me? Can you hear me when I pray for you?

What I would do for one more walk with you in your garden. Potatoes ready for digging? Where, Dad, where?! I see myself kneeling in the dirt, scooping up the little potatoes. Dad is watching me, smiling. “Had a pretty good harvest this year, Susie-Bell. I think I’ve dug up 20 potatoes! OK, let’s go check out those Hollyhocks. I think they’re the tallest they’ve ever been!”

I have at least 50 pictures of Dad in his beloved garden. All the same. There’s Dad in his funny jeans, covered with funny patches to cover up the holes, with his ancient sandals he got on a trip to Mexico. He is smiling from ear to ear. Showing off his current harvest; sometimes a giant Hollyhock reaching for the sun.

I love you Dad. I miss you so much.
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To Heaven!


Fly on angel’s wings!

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Auntie E

red cardinalI need to stop, breathe, think, and get these thoughts down. They are important. As simple as they may sound, to me they say it all and they are worth saying.

My Auntie E is 96 years old and as I write this, she is in her last days; possibly hours. God’s Plan, right? God wrote me into His plan. He gave me a week with one of my most favorite people. The day after I returned home, she took a turn for the worse and has been declining ever since — about a week or so. She is on the east coast and I’m on the west. Upon my return, I came down with the flu which has developed into bronchitis, so returning to her side at this time is not in the cards. E’s loving stepdaughter has remained at her side and along with family and friends, and a wonderful staff at her rest home, along with Hospice, she is in wonderful hands. So that’s not what is troubling me.

I am resolved in the knowledge that I won’t see E again. I’m so thankful that I saw the importance of going on this last trip. I am so grateful that I did not cloud what was so important with silly, self-important excuses — my priorities were where they belonged. When I said goodbye last week, I knelt down and held her tiny hand in mine and looked her square in the eyes and said “I love you so much and I will miss you terribly.” She looked right into my eyes and said “I love you too, and I will miss you very much.” We both knew, at some level, that this would be the last time we would speak to each other.

So what is this sense of urgency? What do I want to say?

I want the world to know that this woman I call Auntie E is, in my opinion, perfect. I used to secretly wish that she was my mom. I loved my mom. Don’t get me wrong — but there is something about E that is so special; so above the norm. She is “God’s Peace” to me. She has always been this way, never wavered. The meanest thing I ever heard her say was “Oh, that BAD ol’ pussy cat!” as she reprimanded one of her rescued “babies”.

Auntie E should win an award for something. There should be fireworks! You should meet her! She is what we all strive to be. A loving, caring human being who can only see good in everyone and everything she touches. No exceptions. Period. We need more people like this in the world. Please celebrate this special life with me! Please lift her up in your prayers.

I am so blessed that you have been in my life, E. God bless you and keep you in His loving care. Until we meet again….

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